Harlan Cohen performing as “The Naked Roomate.” Photos by Gabriella Tutino/The Mirror.
“There are three situations in which the end result will be sex:
1) If you’re in a room with someone long enough,
2) If you’re in a room with alcohol,
3) If you do not think about it.”
And so Harlan Cohen, best-selling author of “The Naked Roommate: And 107 Other Issues You Might Run Into in College,” imparted his wisdom to Fairfield students this past Tuesday night.
Cohen is an advice columnist, singer/songwriter and comedian who knows his audience well. After opening the show with a few jokes about chlamydia, he launched into a song about meeting a nudist roommate, a situation that hopefully most of us have never encountered.
Cohen’s main objective of the show was to inspire, motivate and help students with the ins and outs of college life, focusing mostly on relationships, romantic or otherwise. His talk was a huge success, attracting a crowd of about 350 students in the campus center.
He interacted with the students, putting them on the spot with such questions such as “Who is recently single?” and “Who is looking for sex?”
He shared his own college stories and personal philosophies on love, ascribing it to being comfortable in a thong.
Cohen asks Stefanie Minuto ‘12 what she’s looking for in a guy.
“There are different roles we play in life and different times where we feel more comfortable in our thong. And other times, when we are uncomfortable in our thong, instead of turning off the lights … it’s healthy to turn on the lights and stand in front of this mirror with eight different sides and let it all hang out,” Cohen said. He continued by saying that if students can embrace and display [whatever] others will fall in love with what is offered. “Like my ears,” he said (as Cohen used his big ears as an example).
Cohen was genuinely funny, and peppered his talk with small jokes about STDs, sex and awkward situations. Ba sic college humor. But the best thing he has to offer was his advice.
“If you are single and looking for a relationship, there are thousands out there for you to find,” Cohen said. He applies the same idea to bad relationships too — get out of it and look for your other options.
His ultimate point for students is to just put themselves out there, because it’s all about risk-taking.
“If you give someone permission to not want you, you can talk to them without worry. And maybe something will develop,” he urged.
Overall, the FUSA event was a hit. Cohen closed with a song about syphilis, and students laughed through the entire program before asking for personal advice once it ended.
Sophomore Laura Toolan really enjoyed the show.
“I though he was really dead-on, and really interesting,” she said. “I’m definitely going to take some of his advice and apply it to my life.”
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