He Said: What Not to Wear

For the Fairfield rookies, it’s time they learn that Fairfield U. is known as J Crew U. for a reason. Honestly, walking around campus is like walking to into a seasonal catalog for that company. And I am pretty convinced that some of these kid’s wardrobes are more expensive than my car. But let’s be real, when you’re going out, nobody really cares where your threads are from, but as long as you look fresh to death you’ll be alright for the night.

The only advice I really have is to make sure your attire is appropriate for the situation. For example, if you’re going to a classy place make sure you rock a fresh button-down. Guys, girls turn into m&m’s and melt when they see that.

However, if you are going to a casual house party you cannot go wrong with just the jeans and T-shirt look. Just make sure your clothes are clean because you don’t want people thinking you’re homeless. Going to school in the seventh richest county in America, it’s all about the Benjamins to some of these people, so try to look the part.

However, I truly do not care what you guys wear out because fashion is not my forte and I think it is nearly as dumb as Jon and Kate Gosselin having a television show.

But I do think that there are two fashion issues that we see at Fairfield more than any university in the country. And they are guys popping their collars and wearing different color khaki pants. The popping collar look is the definition of a Guido.

Guys, collars were meant to be down and even though The T-shirt guy’s elegantly written article from a few years back promotes it to be fashionable, I have never seen a guy pull it off, just like a chick would never pull it off you.

As for the different color khakis, that is too easy a subject to mock. But if I was wearing a pair of blue pants with white stripes as Ray Penzi did the other night at the Grape,  I do not think I could ever take myself seriously. I know that was too easy of a shot to take, buddy, but if I saw myself in those pants I probably would kick my own a**.

Just remember, you should care about your dress in order to get the girl. Girls do not want to have an intellectual conversation with you that night if you’re looking like a scrub.