Busy lines at department stores, eight-foot tall inflatable Santas, twinkling lights covering houses. Yup, it’s Christmas and you know what that means, an influx of invitations to annual holiday semi-formals.
After developing my pictures from this past weekend’s extravaganza at the Traffic Barren/Immaculate Consumption (whatever the name is this week), I have realized that holiday parties are a legitimate excuse for a drunken mess. Now, not that any day of the week isn’t an excuse to absorb yourself in mass quantities of alcohol, but holiday get-togethers seem to bring out more jovial drunks than any other time of the year.
The end of the semester is always hectic and the only escape route from the impending fear of finals is alcohol. The holiday season insists that friends get together and be merry by being complete gluttons while neglecting every ounce of work that our “esteemed” professors have piled on us the last two days of the semester.
I personally love holiday parties and Fairfield is notorious for massive amounts of holiday cheer. Getting dressed up is a nice relief from the jeans and sweatpants that fill my closet. Despite the fact that my dress usually consists of less fabric than what’s needed to make a t-shirt, nothing beats allowing yourself to get extremely inebriated, knowing full well that everyone else in the house will be doing the same thing.
What other time of the year do all of your wishes come true? All of your guy friends, dressed like rich business men, will accumulate in one place. Throw back a few glasses of eggnog and its a shoe-in that one of the guys will fulfill your ultimate fantasy of mingling with an older, more experienced, Wall Street stock trader – oh wait, sorry, that may just be my fantasy.
And guys, what more can you ask for than a room full of scantily dressed girls, only wanting to be kept warm on a cold winter’s night. It’s a win/win situation for us both.
Holiday party expectations- know that you will be too drunk to stand, hopefully not too drunk to “perform,” mistletoe ensures you will hook-up with someone, everyone looks too nice to not get laid, and amateurs will projectile somewhere, at some point in the night. But most of all, expect that these could be some of the best parties of the year.
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