She Said “No more double standards”

The boys at the Traffic Barron are missing one thing… Eric Walker. The two of us have stepped up to the challenge of making people laugh each week and we have done a damn good job. There is a reason why you get chosen for this column and what it comes down to is that Eric and I have no shame. Every now and then I hear a little birds whispering in my ear that what I write should not be coming out of the mouth of a classy, educated, young lady; that I am humiliating myself and the males at this school. No more double standards. If Eric can say it, I can say it too. But you know what? I really don’t care. Each week I promise you the less-than-classy, less-than-educated thoughts of a drunken college girl on a Friday night. I may be a bit scandalous in my humor, but I could not do it without Eric. Eric writes with no one in mind, which allows for the overall level of decency to drop-and we all love it. Not once have I heard anyone come to me and tell me that Eric is offending all of the females on this campus. Every time someone reads his article I hear, “That is so horrible… but I love it.” And Eric, I applaud you for your tasteless thoughts about women and letting all of us girls know what goes through your mind. And lets be honest, Eric makes me look like a hooker turned heavenly. I’m a saint compared to him. The two of us have mocked everyone at this campus at one point or another. We all know what the majority of college students do: drink, hook up and have a good time. Each week we give students at this school what they want to hear. They want humor, they want something they can relate to. There are so many serious issues going on in the world, everyone needs something to make them laugh, and if it happens to be our column, then hey, Eric and I have done our jobs. If you don’t like what we mention every week then don’t read it. We may not be cultured in our writing but I know we are making you laugh. And for those of you that may wonder where Eric and I get our topics, my mom sends them to us so I don’t think I am offending her either… Just kidding.