Her Cocktail, His Beer

Her Cocktail – Maggie MacKenzie

The holiday season has officially arrived. And what does that mean? Nonstop talk about my least favorite word in the dictionary, that dreaded, four-letter word otherwise known as diet.

It means that you can almost always count on overhearing groups of girls talking about Weight Watchers, carbs (public enemy number one) and the gym, since it appears that fitting into that New Year’s Eve dress is of the highest priority these days.

I’ve been hearing way too many girls’ diet plan,s most of which consist of water, celery and lettuce. No bread, no chips and you can kiss away anything in which the main ingredient is chocolate. Scrooge much?

What ever happened to “everything in moderation?” I get it, there is a mentality that if you look good you feel good but how much fun can that water and air diet really be? I really don’t think I would feel too good if I couldn’t have any chocolate. Just saying.

No this doesn’t mean that I think you should have McDonalds for breakfast, lunch and dinner I just don’t believe that having calories on your brain 24/7 is all that, believe it or not, healthy for you.

I think that diets turn into an obsession; which turns into a problem. And really, who has the time for another problem? I think that the female population both on this campus and in general are way too hard on themselves and need to learn to love what they have. And if they are unhappy then go about changing it in a positive, healthy way.

I think the ‘healthy way’ is a combination of some cardio and a balanced diet; which we all learned about in our eighth-grade health class so no need to bore you with specifics. It hasn’t changed. Fruits, vegetables, protein and the occasional splurge that won’t turn you into the Pillsbury Dough Boy. I promise you.

What’s the moral of the story? I think the word diet should be completely removed from our vocabulary and the new mantra should return to “everything in moderation.” As Drake so truthfully stated, “You only live once.” And I certainly do not want to be living off of the deadly three: water, celery and lettuce.

fg

His Beer – Tom Shea

As the calendar turns over into December, we head into the thick of what I’m going to call the GEM of the year: the Greatest Eating Month.

Beginning on Thanksgiving and ending shortly after New Year’s Day, this unofficial GEM features a wide variety of some of the greatest foods known to mankind: turkey and pies on Thanksgiving, giving way to ham and every kind of baked good you can imagine for Christmas. For you Italians out there, I’ve been told your Christmases have more types of delicious fish than I knew existed, not to mention all those ridiculously good Italian cookies and whatnot that I can’t even pronounce but always stuff my face with.

Then to top off the GEM are all the New Year’s parties, full of appetizers and alcohol — which make us all feel good in one way or another.

So why is it that people, mainly females, feel the need to boycott this phenomenally delectable time of year in favor of dieting?

Look, I somewhat understand the feeling that you want to look your best for those New Year’s celebrations, and to fit into the little dress that you bought in the midst of all the holiday shopping deals. But at what cost does it come?

When I hear my partner here talking about eating lettuce and water, my mind does not think of dieting, it thinks of prison. In addition to torturing yourself by watching your friends eat all the foods you’ve forbidden from entering your body, you in turn get nothing but the most tasteless foods in existence, combined with the excitement of drinking water.

I realize that I am not the best person to be taking advice from when it comes to food. As I write this article, I’m eagerly looking ahead to my dinner for tonight of a pulled pork quesadilla. I’m also not preaching that people should follow my lead and stop watching what they eat altogether during the holidays (so I gain a few pounds of winter weight, who cares? It’s cold outside, it acts as insulation. Have fun freezing, you dieting people).

There is nothing wrong with a good diet. Helps clean out the system, you feel better physically, you think better of yourself mentally, and it usually comes with some compliments, which are always nice. It makes sense to me to diet in spring and heading into the summer, as everyone is wearing a little less clothing and it’s fun to show off the body after dropping a few pounds (again, not something I’m too familiar with).

But seriously, girls, you have to pick this time of year to give up eating anything? That’s like waking up on July 3 and proclaiming that you never want to play with fireworks ever again.

So excuse me while I have another piece of pie with a brownie on the side, after my Christmas ham. I’m going to enjoy eating people food, and I encourage you to as well, and then join me in trying to burn it all off in January. Live a little, because it sure as hell beats eating the same food that turtles eat.