Disclaimer: The Coffee Break Team knows little to nothing about astrology and has not been certified by the Society of Astrologists to provide horoscopes.



You’re going to have “This is Halloween” stuck in your head for the rest of the week.



You didn’t put any effort into your costume again this year, and no one is impressed.


The opposite of Taurus, you’re going to need to tone it down, Gemini. Don’t get too into your alter ego.



All of us would die on Halloween night without your mom-friending every year. Thanks.



No, TPing your crush’s place of residence is not the most effective way to get their attention.



You can’t just throw on a cloak and be a Harry Potter character every year. One of these days you’re going to have to think of another idea. I know creativity doesn’t come easy for you, but it’s time.



We all know that you’re going to press play on your Christmas playlists the second the clock strikes 12:00 a.m., Nov. 1 tonight.



Scorpio, you need to cool it with the fake blood.



Sagittarius, you’ve been listening to Christmas music since September because you don’t believe time exists, and that’s valid but people are starting to get annoyed, and by Christmas, they’ll be plotting to kill you.


You take Halloween very seriously and it’s not always in a good way.



This is the one day a year during which you can express your true self without genuinely scaring people. Congrats.



Just… don’t eat all the candy this year. It isn’t a record you have to break. You can spare your stomach the pain.

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-- News Editor Emeritus -- English Creative Writing

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