If you ask a group of college students about having a relationship in college, there are bound to be mixed reviews. There are many different kinds of college relationships, such as bringing a high school relationship into college, meeting someone that goes to your school and dating, or maybe, like me, you meet someone while already in college that does not go to your school. Personally, I think that having a relationship in college can be a great thing as long as it is with someone willing to deal with the not-so-great parts of it.
A lot of college students argue that having a relationship in college is somehow causing you to miss out, but I never see it that way. There is also the classic “why be tied down” argument or feeling like playing the field is the best way to see what is out there. For some people, that definitely works and many people are happy to not be in a relationship and not have to worry about what their significant other is doing. In addition, some relationships cannot survive the distance because people find it hard to have a relationship that exists through a phone for weeks at a time. College is a time of growing and changing and because of this, people simply can outgrow a relationship that they feel no longer suits them.
A sophomore who chooses to remain anonymous is an example of someone who entered college with a high school relationship. She revealed the information regarding their split to me and how when they got to college there was just a lack of effort on the side of her ex-boyfriend, and she felt a significant change. “I definitely feel a lot more positive about college and my life in general. During my relationship I felt as if I was always waiting for the next time I would see him or what he was doing,” she said. However, she agreed that she would be open to a relationship if she felt that the same mistakes would not be made.
In my own life, I am in a relationship with a guy who goes to college three hours away. We definitely get sick of being far apart for weeks at a time, but it’s always worth it when we’re back together. I do not know what it is like to have a boyfriend that goes to my school, but I can share some positives and negatives about having a boyfriend who does not.
On the negative side, it is a lot of FaceTime calls and time apart. Aside from holidays at home and occasional visits to each other’s schools, the majority of the time is spent apart. Another negative can be the jealousy that sometimes occurs when you see your significant other out. It can drive you crazy but you have to stick it out because all of the negatives are outweighed by the positives. Seeing one another after time apart seems to make you forget that you just spent weeks missing one another. Catching up on what has happened in person instead of over the phone is incomparable. There is also the bonus of having two schools to hang out at, so you get to meet new people that become just as much your friends as their friends.
There are many benefits, but in my opinion the most satisfying one is probably when the school year does end; you know how solid your relationship is because you have successfully dealt with the stress of dating in college. While people will always differ in opinion about dating in college, it is a definite yes from me. Once a couple can adapt to dealing with the difficulties of having a college relationship, that relationship has the potential to bring incomparable happiness.