Having friends of the opposite sex is perfect and carefree… when you are twelve. At our age now, it is infidelity and continual denial slapping you in the face each time you “hang out” with that person.
Consider this, ladies: Every guy friend that you have at this school has, at one time or another, fantasized about what it would be like to have sex with you. Guys, every girl friend that you have has thought the same.
But is this so inherently wrong? I say no. Thinking these thoughts is natural and there are definitely advantages to having a friend of the opposite sex over just same sex friends. I mean, it was my next door neighbor who showed me how to unhook a bra back in the day.
In my experience with girl friends, most of them have had serious boyfriends at the time of our friendship. Sounds like bad-news-bears at first, but it is actually a prime situation for friend-making: You can make friends with the boyfriend just to ease your conscience as you picture you and his girlfriend naked together.
All kidding aside… Great things do come out of opposite sex relationships. Girls are great listeners when we guys need to vent and our roommate couldn’t give a crap. Guys are great shoulders to lean on when the girls have had a fight with their parents, or your pal, the boyfriend.
But it’s more fun to talk about the scandalous nature of this, right? Each time you become friends with a member of the opposite sex, you are walking on thin ice. If attraction is present, the relationship, although it says platonic on the outside, has deeper roots. I mean, hasn’t every character on “Friends” kissed each other at one point?
So where does the blame go?
Nobody teaches us how to be “just friends” with the opposite sex. We have all had these discussions growing up about the rules of dating, the birds and the bees and how guys are supposed to treat girls.
Emotional attachment is, in my eyes, synonymous with romance and sexual desire these days. Yes, your close friend from your FYE group may seem like the quintessential friend, and he or she may just be on the outside. But the point I’m trying to make is that he or she, at one point, has thought about more.
Yes, I think opposite sex relationships do exist. However, if attraction is present, they are full of facades, denial and natural desires that we cannot help. It’s OK to think those thoughts, just admit that they are there.
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