Nearly four years ago, when I began my freshman year as a naive 17-year-old, I quickly picked up on the common trends that most freshmen did to have fun, fit in and just learn how the whole “college thing” worked.
When my friends and I were freshmen, we couldn’t wait to be upperclassmen with cars, live in the townhouses or at the beach, throw crazy parties and most importantly turn 21 and not have to worry about whose fake ID we were going to have to borrow for the night and whether or not it was going to work.
When I think about those days, I have come to realize that my most memorable experiences all occurred in that very first year here at Fairfield. It was actually exciting not knowing if we would be able to find the party at the beach or if we would be able to get into a bar.
Even though we weren’t successful about 75 percent of the time, the anticipation was the most fun for us. We would play music while we got ready, chalk our IDs, try on about a thousand outfits, borrow each other’s clothes, take turns doing each other’s make-up and most importantly take a million pictures.
The most pictures I have are from freshman year; every time I look at them I can remember the exact moment and tell a story about the night. I miss those days.
To all upperclassmen, I recommend you relive what we all did when we were freshmen before you finish your years here at Fairfield.
1. Walk in a pack of friends to “prime time” dinner at Barone, find one of those long tables in the back, watch Jojo dance to the hip-hop music with his broom, scope out potential “hook up” candidates, discreetly stare at them and then walk by their tables at least four times to get another drink or dessert and make yourself noticed.
But most importantly, stay at least an hour and a half and watch as the sports teams arrive in packs. (There might be someone who hadn’t caught your eye in the past.) Then make sure to walk back to a residence hall altogether in a ridiculously large group taking up the entire sidewalk.
2. Take the town shuttle to go shopping or the on-campus bus that never arrives on time, and try to get the driver to drop you off at a non-designated part of campus.
3. Keep your door wide open and blast Camron’s “Hey Ma” and anything by Dispatch downloaded from Kazaa. While doing this, constantly instant message anyone you know and leave the annoying “dah dah dunt” noise on.
4. Walk in packs (girls, wear your shortest skirts and highest, most uncomfortable heels) to the townhouses in freezing weather and hop from house to house to find a party that will let you in. If unsuccessful, girls-ditch the guys (they are just using you to get into a party), and find a guy’s house to hang out in.
If you are fortunate enough to “stay the night,” gather your clothes (if you can find all of them or remember where they ended up) and hold your head down so that no one can see you wearing the same clothes from the night before with disheveled hair and proceed with your “walk of shame.” Don’t feel bad if you get some “funny” looks, it happens to the best of us.
5. Socialize until all hours of the night outside of Jogues, smoke some cigarettes (even if you’re not a smoker), talk on your cell phone – that’s if you can get service – and bring a guitar outside to have some Dispatch and Green Day sing-alongs.
6. Hook up in the dorms in the most creative places possible: lounges without locks which are accessible to anyone at any time, shower stalls shared by everyone in the wing and leave the condom and its wrapper wherever it happened to end up and, if you are really desperate, Ryan M. ’06 recommends the laundry room (you can probably get pretty creative with the machines).
7. Call for a cab, wait outside in freezing weather along with at least five other groups of students that also called for a cab, run for the first one and head to the beach. When you arrive at the beach ask someone that looks friendly where the parties are. Chances are that the “friendly” person will send you in the wrong direction and give you a name of a house that doesn’t even exist, such as the “Ugly Freshman.” After realizing that you have no chance of finding a party, especially at the “Ugly Freshman,” sit outside the General Store with the other unsuccessful freshmen and wait for a cab to arrive. Then once again, argue over who gets a cab first – usually it’s the girls wearing the least amount of clothing.
8. Most importantly, find a fake ID and head over to the former Clubhouse to see whether or not you will get rejected. Then try Black Rock and Blue; if that doesn’t work then run across the divided highway to the “townie” bar as a last resort and complain about how unfair it was that the bouncer didn’t accept your ID and accepted someone you know is under 21.
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