Dear Dee
As a current junior, I thought life was going to become easier here at Fairfield rather than more intense and complex. I feel as though I am slipping backwards on so many levels. I have SO much work to do, I am constantly tired, I feel as though my friends don’t care about me, and I don’t see the light at the end of the tunnel anymore. I don’t even go out anymore to parties because I just don’t feel like I want to be around other people. Please tell me if I am all alone with these thoughts. I just want to enjoy my life again.
Thank you,
Darkside
Dear Darkside,
First and most importantly, remember that you are never alone. There is always someone you can turn to and talk to about how you are feeling. It is also very important to remember that what you are feeling is very common amongst college students. From my experience, the semesters do not get easier year to year. They are different, but they are all challenging. The good side to that is you are learning more and growing as an individual. The bad side is that every semester is a challenge. There are many issues that cause stress levels in students to increase. Although we look for ways to find relief, there is still a chance that depression can set in. Couple that with the lack of sleep we get while at school and it can feel as though the walls are closing in.
A study at Washington University in St. Louis showed that one in every three college students deals with some level of depression while in college. Students today deal with many issues that impact our thoughts that may not have been as prevalent years ago. As schools become more expensive, we all struggle with the concept that we may not be able to afford to continue our education. Even if we have student loans, the job market is daunting and we worry we might not get a job when we graduate to even be able to pay them off. We also know we are getting a great education here, but that can also add stress due to the time and effort to successfully complete the courses. All in all, it looks like we do have a lot on our shoulders. It sometimes feels as though there is so much out of our control. What does matter though is that we do have control over the most important element…ourselves!! Some basic practices could include eating healthy meals and getting the sleep you need. Even if that means catching a “power nap”, then do that. You have to take care of yourself. Also, prioritize your work load. Make sure you are organized and plan ahead. Keeping a list can often help because as you cross off what you have accomplished you will feel stronger and successful in those tasks.
The final words of advice I personally believe are the most important ones; find someone you can talk to. It may be as simple as a call to your mom, or your best friend. Sometimes just acknowledging that you are frustrated and knowing that someone else is there if you need them can make a huge difference in how you feel. Also, if you feel that you need to talk to someone else, there are resources right here at Fairfield that you can turn to. The Counseling & Psychological Services center is a free, confidential service for full-time undergraduate students. They provide individual and group session led by professional psychotherapists to help students navigate adjustment issues, relationship problems, family issues, and emotional distress. Remember that you are a valued member of Fairfield University and are not alone at all. Reach out if you need to and know there is always hope and someone to help you get through any darkside you might encounter.
If you or a friend has a psychological emergency or crisis, please access Counseling & Psychological Services as follows:
Weekdays – Call (203) 254-4000 ext. 2146 during regular working hours between 8:30 a.m.-4:30 p.m. to speak to a counselor.
After-office hours and weekends – Call Public Safety at (203) 254-4000 ext.4090. The on-call counselor will respond.
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