“I hope Lucas the Stag wasn’t too lonely over break.”
“What happened to your hair?” “I did it this morning.”
“Going back to Barone. Send help.”
“The nuggets are back!”
“Pretty sure I saw a potato fly around the dorm last night.”
“My teacher emailed me in all caps and I felt like I was getting in trouble.”
“I saw a guy peeing while walking last night … it was quite impressive.”
“Has anyone else felt personally victimized by the Department of Public Safety?”
“Syllabus week or hibernation?”
“I miss my mommy’s mashed potatoes.”
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