It’s 2 a.m. and you are a hungry college student, therefore you are obligated to find the nearest takeout menu that someone creepily slid under your door and order anything that you and your friends are craving. This is called the “college diet” and it lacks fruits and vegetables as well as self-control and proper nourishment.
Poor eating habits are one aspect of the college lifestyle. Now, there are some people who stick to the healthy options, so props to them, but we are talking about the vast majority here. The average college diet at Fairfield consists of two phases: the underclassman and the upperclassman.
Phase 1 is made up of freshman and sophomores who are lucky enough to have limited personal cooking options and a dining hall that does most of the cooking for them. Barone tends to tempt the young stag stomach with french fries, burgers and tons of ice cream. These inclinations do not stop once you leave Barone, though. While in your room studying, what better way is there to procrastinate than by making some good ‘ole microwavable popcorn?
Another favorite in the Phase 1 plan is cereal. Day or night, with or without milk, lunch or dinner, none of this matters. Cereal is a perfect food that is always there. Some people really try to be adventurous and take advantage of the micro-fridge by making hot pockets.
All this aside, care packages are probably the main downfall of the members of Phase 1. These students have families and friends that really miss them because they are still adapting to the student living away from home and somehow that leads to them sending ridiculous amounts of candy, chips, and junk food that I guess is somehow supposed to make the distance between them easier to bear.
Once a student has reached Phase 2 and is living in a townhouse or beach house, his or her palate has reached the point of full maturity. There are only five words to describe this: bring on the pizza rolls. It really seems like too much energy to actually cook or even think about cooking anything.
Basically, there is one and only one qualification in order for a food to become a part of this college diet: convenience. SpaghettiOs also require almost no energy whatsoever to cook, so they have earned their place as a great source of nutrition for students. There is a main food group that strictly involves boiling water that seems to be particularly popular among the Phase 2 population, consisting of gourmet options like pasta and hot dogs. The most utilized part of the Phase 2 kitchen areas are the freezers. Frozen meals appear to be a fantastic option for any occasion. The freezers are constantly overflowing with microwaveable pizzas. Without this staple sustenance, many Phase 2 members would probably starve to death.
Be sure to realize that there are several factors that are considered to be essential to both phases. These include, but are not limited to: Ramen noodles, macaroni and cheese and any form of caffeine in sight.
In conclusion, I would like to draw attention to the fact that caffeine is perhaps the most important element of the well-balanced ideal college habitual eating style. Some people stick to the classics and chug large amounts of coffee and tea. Others branch out and drink liquids such as Red Bull, Monster or Five Hour Energy. No matter what form, this liquid motivation is surely the final element to complete the perfect college food pyramid that gets us all through a long week of classes.
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