With talk of pelvis-shattering rams, the universal love of car accidents, scented markers, murderous rampaging co-workers and a conclusion of naughty sexual remarks, Dane Cook was repeatedly thanked by the thunderous screaming and applause of the standing crowd of about 2,500 on Nov. 20. He entered Alumni Hall adorned in an LA-style leather jacket, a hint of the stardom this Arlington, Mass. native has risen to over the last 14 years.

After speaking with Cook on the phone before his show, everyone can now know what drives this “hottest comic,” as Rolling Stone likes to call him.

“Hard f–ing work, dude.”

Of course it helps that the man has completely forgotten what it is like to be nervous or apprehensive on stage.

“I don’t remember ever being nervous, just apprehensive,” he said. “And now that that’s gone, I am able to just have a good time.”

Since the record-breaking release of his Comedy Central CD/DVD combination “Harmful if Swallowed” a year ago, Cook’s fan-base has grown exponentially. He thanks his fans daily by reading every piece of mail he is sent, as well as messages left on his self-run website, AIM and his MySpace.com webpage. Embracing his popularity, he stays after every show to greet everyone, a requirement that is actually expressed in his contract. Approximately 15 minutes after the show, amongst the empty chairs and bleachers was when the man truly shined. He signed everything from a dollar bill to a shopping list to a camera. He talked to fans across the country on cell phones, blatantly ignoring his agent’s disapproval. He smiled and sported his trademarked double-middle finger move in each and every picture. He calls it “su-fi” (like hi-fi); Dane-Speak for super finger.

“I was in Berkeley, Ca. last night for an audience of about 4,000,” he told the small crowd. “Fairfield was more than twice as loud, so baby, you guys got twice the show!”

Cook explained his affection toward fans and even non-fans.

“I love that guy who comes up to me after a show and says, ‘I’m sorry, but you suck.’ It happens from time-to-time, and I learn from it,” Cook said. “What I love even more is when that girl runs at me, screaming my name in the street and jumps on me, licking my face, and there’s five people around us stepping back saying, ‘who the f-k is this guy?’ And then they find out, hear my s-t, and tell more people.”

Who are his fans?

“I’ve always got the college kids to thank; they seem to be my greatest fans,” he said.

However, after watching people enter Alumni Hall the night of the show, one couldn’t help but notice the many middle-aged double dates. Bottom line: if a venue books Dane Cook, they will come.

And thanks to FUSA, they sure did come. Selling tickets for $15 to students was a real privilege. FUSA sets the student price lower than the public price and subsidizes the difference.

For this completely sold-out show, a reported $35,000 goes to Cook’s agency, according to Deirdre Eller, director of new student programs. Another $10,000 or so goes into planning and setting up for the event. Most of these costs are also subsidized by the FUSA.

“Most campuses our size can’t have one concert in a year, let alone two,” Eller said. “Fairfield students are pretty lucky.”

The sound quality, another major problem from last year’s comedy performance, was also improved. Students who attended Dave Chappelle’s performance last fall described his act as inaudible due to poor sound quality. However, after increasing the quality of speakers, FUSA erased this problem.

If you went, you laughed. If you didn’t go, your friends will be talking about this show until they get you to see him. Some people were still disappointed that FUSA did not get a musician this time around.

“Back in the 80s FUSA got acts like The Police and U2. Why are they getting comics now?” asks Kimberly Packer, a Fairfield alumna.

With a pilot filmed for a Seinfeld-esque sitcom and with the rock and roll-esque month-long comedy tour scheduled for April that resembles a Robin Williams move, Dane Cook could quickly be heading toward becoming a household name. His CD/DVD has sold close to 200,000 copies, with the next one scheduled for release after Christmas and expected to break the records now held by Cook himself.

“After next year, he will not be priced for college shows,” Eller predicted.

After the show, it was hard to find someone unimpressed by Dane Cook.

“From the moment he stepped on that stage, I knew he was something special,” said Michael Paddon ’07.

Michelle Holmberg ’08 agreed.

“His energy was just palpable, and there were never any low points in the show,” she said. “I can’t imagine another comedian having been as energetic or having a better connection with the audience.”

With all his recent success, Cook cannot help but love his job.

“You know what? Thank God I’m good at this, man. This is the best job in the world.”

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