Ring, ring! London is calling! Greetings from Mother England! As a Fairfield tour guide, I have to love Fairfield. However, studying (ahem) in London tops any townhouse/beach house party any night of the week – including Tuesdays.
Exchange rate: Can you hear the echo in my bank account all the way in Connecticut? You’ll get used to feeling as though you’re in post-World War II Germany pushing a wheel barrel full of worthless American money around to buy an order of chips. Actually, you’d be better off pulling a “Trading Spaces” and using those American dollars as wallpaper. Allow me to translate: everything costs double in England. Drinks on me when I return! The shopping is ridiculous, however. For no additional charge, one can say “Oh thanks, I got this in London!” Ah, the power of brand marketing.
Food: Right-o. London cuisine is not so great. I find myself suddenly very jealous of Florence-bound students. Who would have thought that anyone could ever miss Barone? One point for Sodexho! No wonder poor Kate Moss is a waif – the poor girl lives in a city where tea and crumpets are the highlights of their diet! Everyone in London goes for the heroin chic look – or should I say hungry chic?
Fashion: Europeans love molded hobbit shoes – or anything tacky that looks like you might have bought it in Vegas. The style is very “I got dressed in the dark” – but what else do you expect from foggy London? The fog is your fashion friend. One exception to this is businessmen who carry their beloved Louis Vuitton (non-knockoff) briefcases. Talk about culture shock!
Weather: Disregard the above comment concerning the weather. Who started the rumor that it always rains in London? I bet it was the French. Everyday boston.com reports that the weather in London is (feign shock)… rain! One will be strolling along the street on a gorgeous, sunny day when a sudden shower sets in. Duck! A stampede of umbrellas will appear out of nowhere. I swear Brits carry their “brollies” on their key chains.
Accents: I think American girls would be happy dating a hippo so long as it had the critical British accent. Sure, cockney slang is charming at first. However, imagine listening to Hugh Grant bumbling non-stop “Oh dear! My my my!” “Horrid” and “indeed” pop up inexplicably in conversation. Indeed.
Field trips: The field trips are amazing! On many expeditions you will discover that Henry VIII acquired more property than Donald Trump. “No, I can’t meet you for tea because I’m going on a field trip to Buckingham Palace” is a top ten phrase. Note: No Prince William sightings.
Diversity: Sadly, London is not filled solely with Colin Firths. Never have I seen so many diverse people in one place (with the exception of Disney’s “It’s a Small World”). Indians (I hope you like the smell of curry), Asians and a random assortment of Euros are a notable presence here. Perhaps Fairfield could snag a few Londoners to improve its diversity rating? Sore subject.
Theater: London theater houses are haunted with the ghosts of celebrity past. Sorry Broadway, but nothing will ever compare to being among a crowd of rowdy Germans to cheer on David Hasselhoff in “Chicago.” Christian – what’s his last name – oh, Slater – is currently starring in “One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest.” Buy your tickets now.
Despite its “charms,” London is a truly cosmopolitan and inspirational city. David Beckham sends his love.
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