Envision this: You and your best friend are at a bar or party, and you catch the tall, dark, handsome, Collin Farrell-esque guy across the way eyeing you, knowing full well what he is thinking… mmhmm.
Perfect, right? Not until you realize that the busted guy standing next to him is his best friend and the whole situation has shifted from a little one-on-one time to a tag team event. We all know that sacrifices sometimes need to be made in friendships and it’s time for your best friend to step up, take one for the team, and be the not-so-illustrious wingman.
Being the wingman is a little different for girls than it is for guys. And guys, there are a few things you need to understand.
First off, if your friend really is as ugly as I think (even after a few G-n-Ts), then there probably isn’t enough alcohol in the whole bar for me to find your friend remotely attractive. Roofie me, drug me, whatever, it probably won’t be getting me running out the door to head back to your place.
When guys are playing the “wingman”, they automatically assume just because their friend is getting laid then so are they. Ummm … yeah, probably not.
Personally, I am not too keen on being felt-up by some skeevy guy who thinks he has better moves than a dolphin in water. No way I am going to head home with someone who thinks he’s Ron Jeremy – and the wingmen always do. I mean, they need something to boost their esteem seeing as how they obviously weren’t first choice.
For girls, it’s different. We have pride and dignity. I would never expect one of my friends to go home with someone who is “sub-par” for my sake of getting a little ass. I wouldn’t want her to do it to me so why would I ever return that displeasure on her.
I mean, if she’s up for it and he has something to offer, good looks, a decent personality, sense of humor, anything, then take it as a bonus point and we can all have fun.
Guys have the tendency to whine and plead with their friends to “take one for the team.” I mean, honestly, has it been that long since you have gotten some good ass that you have to grovel like a small child, on your hands and knees, just to brag about it tomorrow? If this is the case, please don’t show your face.
Remember, boys, if you are going to that much trouble as to ask for assistance from a friend then you need to rethink the girls you are going for. They may be out of your league, or maybe you need to get some better quality friends to aid in your endeavors.
Leave a Reply