Dear Dee,
I feel like I have been waiting for love for way too long. I’ve been thinking lately that maybe I am setting my standards too high. Should I lower my standards from what I think I deserve in a man?
Hmm, well here’s a question for you. What if you saw an amazing pair of Nine West shoes in the window just calling your name, and when you went in to try them on they didn’t fit, would you squeeze your foot into them?
Although they may be shiny and new, even fun to wear around for that upcoming weekend, they aren’t comfortable. Having shoes that you can’t be comfortable in can lead to blisters and cramped
toes, which we all know is a pain in the, uh, foot.
Well, in my shoe-a-holic world, I see a relationship in the same sort of light. A relationship, especially love, is filled with excitement, fun, and most of the time, can be labeled as amazing. However, that being said, all that fun and excitement, all that “amazingness” comes to be that way because of being able to be yourself around that person.
Being comfortable in your own skin is a reward, but feeling comfortable in your own skin WITH someone else? Now, that’s one of the greatest rewards love can give. I mean who doesn’t love lounging around in sweatpants and a tank top and still know your boyfriend thinks you’re sexy. As we all know, the “honeymoon period” of a relationship always makes you feel like your in middle school again with the butterflies and the constant thoughts that run through your mind about that one person.
The thing is, after you’ve been with someone for a while, the excitement of someone new begins to fade, and in place of that excitement is something much more fulfilling; the comfort of one another and the feeling you can completely be your dumb, controlling, girly self in front of him. If you settle for less than you think you deserve because you’re bored of waiting or believe you’ll never find him, just that will wind up happening; you will never find him, and you also won’t find true love.
While you’re dating Mr. Okay, you’ll be missing out on Mr. Perfect just because you didn’t want to wait a little longer. So, if you think you deserve a prince charming that takes you out and makes you feel like a better person, then you sure as hell deserve it as long as you’re willing to try and give the same thing back.
It’s like my girl Diana Ross said, “You can’t hurry love.” So sit back and enjoy yourself, do the things you’ve been itching to do lately, flirt with that boy at Chef’s Table, get that mani pedi you’ve been contemplating, and when the time is right, Prince Charming will come around and your foot will slide into that perfect Nine West shoe.
Disclaimer: This column is for entertainment only. The author is a student, not a licensed therapist, and this column is not intended to take the place of professional advice. The views expressed are the author’s and are not necessarily shared by The Mirror or its staff.
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