Here is a pro/con list for life at Fairfield for the 2003-2004 year. Let’s just dive in:
PRO: After three years of hard work and sizable tuition bills, the class of 2004 is almost at the end of their undergraduate career.
CON: Half of us are going to have to obtain Master’s degrees or higher, racking up more debt and deal with having to become responsible adults on our own. Mom and Dad have already converted your bedroom into a study.
PRO: StagWeb: newer, sleeker, and dare I say…sexier? Finally, the name of our computer service reflects our dear mascot.
CON: Hey, did you hear the one about two worms, a virus and a bunch of students whose computers tanked? Pro within the con: you can bring your computer to the BCC and get it checked out. Con within a con: all of the computer support people will see your dirty Anna Kournikova pictures.
PRO: Last year’s freshmen are no longer freshmen.
CON: There is a new group of freshmen, and they’re smarter. Beware the super-freshmen.
PRO: The Stag Diner is new.
CON: The prices are not.
PRO: The Quick Center is getting a new carpet in the lobby.
CON: Anyone who attends the Bacon Brothers performance at the Quick Center this year does not actually care about Kevin Bacon in a musical context (exception: dancing to the song “Footloose”).
PRO: The mold problem in the apartments has been taken care of, and we even got new rugs.
CON: The windows have been bolted shut in an effort to keep moisture out, which also limits ventilation. There are many smells in the world, and you probably are not going to like it when several of the funkier varieties pop up and there won’t be enough Lysol or Febreze in the world to get rid of them.
PRO: TAPS promotes responsible drinking and partying, something which many feel is sorely lacking at Fairfield University.
CON: The presentation was an exact replica of the one I sat through in my 9th grade “Decisions” class. At least that class had an entertainment factor (picture a 45-year-old, serious, white male “rapping” “Let’s Talk About Sex Baby” to begin the Safe Sex unit).
PRO: The column has a new, catchy name.
CON: “Marshall’s Law” was the only printable title the editors came up with at their meeting.
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