SHE said: Thanksgiving

I don’t know how Thanksgiving goes down for most of you, but here’s what its like for me. First, my family takes some time to reflect quietly on the journey of the pilgrims to America and how Thanksgiving united them with the Native Americans. Then we all go around and say things that we are most thankful for and sing Thanksgiving carols. I then lead my town’s Thanksgiving parade dressed as Pocahontas and doing my famous flaming baton routine.

Okay, no, not really at all. First, I’m woken up entirely too early for a day when I have no work or class. Then, I’ll get ready and put on what I presume to be a wonderful fall outfit (preferably something with an elastic waist in preparation for the food marathon that’s about to begin), and I’ll walk downstairs where, without a doubt, Nan Donlon will be waiting to say, “Oh, you’re wearing that?” This will be the catalyst for the “21st Annual Thanksgiving Morning What to Wear Fight – ’06.” Finally, we’ll all eventually give up and let Nan dress us in whatever she so desires-most likely a velvet pantsuit or stirrup pants covered with turkeys and an oversized holiday sweater that was a gift from my Great Aunt Gretchen.

Next, the six of us cram into a car made for five, and visit two sets of my rather large Irish Catholic family. I’ll then spend some time shamelessly stuffing my face with fine cuisine and delicacies made by my aunts like Velveeta cheese dip and those little hot dogs wrapped in tiny croissants. Then, inevitably, one of my aunts will ask me why I don’t have a boyfriend or if I’ve gotten bigger or an equally depressing question…enter more Velveeta cheese dip and tiny hot dog croissants.

Eventually, we’ll finally all sit down for the real deal, but I’ll still end up having to sit at the kid’s table. After playing food monitor and official food cutter for an hour or so, it’s time to roll over on the couch like a beached whale and wait for my food coma to end.

It may not be what Norman Rockwell was picturing when he was painting his famous Thanksgiving scene, but it usually ends up being a pretty entertaining day with my crazy family. Happy Thanksgiving Everybody!