Dear Santa,
I’ve been a very good little college student this semester. I’ve gone to all my classes, I’ve done all my assignments on time (at least that’s I wrote on those yellow evaluation slips) and you know when I’ve been sleeping (not at all).
Pulling three all-nighters in a row and missing out on 50 cent drafts has to be enough to put me on the nice list, right? So, please, Santa, help me out here. For Christmas I would like:
1.A pair of cross country skis so that I can get to class since no one bothered to shovel the paths.
2.A plow so that I have a shot at getting up the School of Business hill without spinning out and crashing into a tree.
3.Home Depot not to be sold out of shovels next time there’s a snowstorm so that I don’t have to wade through a foot of snow to get out of my house.
4.50 hour days so that I can realistically finish all of my work before Christmas.
5.A personal secretary to write all of my papers.
6.More than two measly reading days.
7.Saturday finals to be abolished, forever.
8.To make my professors take all my finals for me, in addition to making me breakfast.
9.An all expenses paid Spring Break trip to Cancun for me and 10 of my closest friends.
10.Heat to be free (and electric, and garbage collection, and cable…)
11.Rent money…for the rest of the year.
12.A snowstorm that actually cancels classes.
13.All of my loans to be paid off before graduation.
14.A mold-free apartment with windows that actually open.
15.A job for after graduation, preferably starting somewhere in the 60 K- 100K range
16.Christmas cookies that taste amazing and have no fat or calories whatsoever.
17.Stagweb to actually work (and come up with a better name than “stagweb” while you’re at it so I don’t scare off potential future employers).
18.The bookstore to buy back all my books at twice their original value.
19.Clam Jam to come back this spring.
20. A senior event that the whole class can actually attend.
Thanks, Santa. I’ll be checking my mailbox for your answer, or you can feel free to send a package since my parents stopped sending those freshman year.
Sincerely,
Stressed out college student
P.S. And I would also like a pony.
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